I admit it now. If you want to live your life, depend on your own self. No depending on anyone. Not parents, not siblings...no one...Not even your partner in life. No one at all. When my child grows up... I am making him as independent as ever. I will give him his own house when he wants to marry someone and will not at all interfere with his life. Thats it. I'll do with him whatever was not done with me.
Why are people around me so different then what I want them to be. Why me...Always the same question pops up in my mind.
When will I have that life which I want. You can do everything with me, curse my child, say bad things to him, scold him whenever you want...and I cant even say a word because you are elder. If you are elder then me then act like an elder. Dont test my patience. He is my son and I am supposed to keep him away from every such person who even looks at him harshly. But all I can do is ignore whatever you do. If am dependent upon you right now...Dont forget that one day I will be independent. And after that happens I will not even look back at you. Then I not be able to forget it all.
How much I wish that I can have what I want quickly because everyone around me is driving me crazy at the moment. Targetting me, talking about my life all the time..scolding my son..what are you trying to do...dont jeaporize me. Wait for sometime...I will go...one day...someday.
I wish my wishes may come true...and it better be soon.
You be happy.
P.S. Thanks for your comments, i dont write often because i dont have regular access to the computer, when i do, i write. tc.
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Giddyup! You make it seem as if it is a give-and-take scenario where you are living. as if you are living in exchange for letting people scold you, in exchange for making yourself a punching bag for them, in exchange for allowing yourself to be abused. Why do you think it is like that? Okay, your inlaws are your inlaws, but this is our family, right? Treat them like family! Since birth have you lived in a give & take relationship with your parents? your siblings? Do you care for your siblings only because they do your homework or they let you stay? You'll stop being a sister if they lose their minds? CAN you even stop being a sister? Can you be born again of some other mother? Can you guarantee that things will be better there than here?
ReplyDeleteAll things are not give and take. you are not living because you let them abuse you. if you feel abused and if you really consider your family your family, let them know. if they have a reason, they'll say it; if you have a better reason, they'll stop; if they have a better reason, understand & learn.
If you let things take control of you, there is no way but down. If you control things, there is no way but up. Even if they go down, be satisfied that you did what you wanted.]
Do not live are you are living for the sake of living. live like you want to live with them, the same feeling will be returned. I promise. Better people than me promise.
"Treat others similar to the way you would like for them to treat you - Hasan (as) son of Ali (as)"
Things are not as bad as they seem. Believe me. Believe me on this one.
P.S. It's me. I'm cranky. Fear me.
ReplyDeleteRRrrrun for yourrrr llliiifffeeeeeeeeeee. Aaaa!!